A Peculiar Person

by Joe Hickman, editor, HaLife.com

     He was five years old. His name was Roger. We were sitting on the sidewalk, leaning back against the church building.

     After a rousing time of running and cartwheeling, five-year-olds seldom but sometimes like to rest, sit on the sidewalk, and lean against a building.

     I'd never done it much myself, but I was enjoying the quiet. Until Roger began observing.

     "Mister Joe," said Roger. "You're kinda thick, aren't you?"

     "Well, yeah, I reckon I'm kinda thick, " I acknowledged with a phony loving grin.

     Fortunately, Roger tired quickly of observing, and he was ready to run again.

     But Roger was right. In my prime, I was thick.

     I added most of the thickness when I stopped smoking. My doctor said, "Don't worry about it until you gain 75 pounds." That's how glad he was I gave up cigarettes.

     Though the years, my thickness gradually went away as I slowly broke a serious Little Debbie habit and also gave up most soft drinks. Then, I continued losing weight, without trying.

     Now, at 124, I'd actually like to gain a little. 124 is my weight, not my age.

     The problem is, when I eat a lot, I can't breathe very well. The 30 years of smoking left my lungs a lot older than the rest of me.

     So with obesity waddling rampant in this country, I am trying to figure how to gain some weight while continuing to breathe.

     I am a peculiar person.

     But, Roger, you should be pleased to know I am no longer thick.

     Except maybe in the head.

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