We have all learned to live with "voice mail" as a necessary part of modern
life. But have you wondered what it would be like if God decided to install voice mail?
Imagine praying and hearing this:
Thank you for calling My Father's House. Please select one of the
following options:
- Press 1 for Requests
- Press 2 for Thanksgiving
- Press 3 for Complaints
- Press 4 for All Other Inquiries.
What if God used the familiar excuse...
"I'm sorry, all of our angels are busy helping other saints
right now. However, your prayer is important to us and will be answered in the order it
was received, so please stay on the line."
Can you imagine getting these responses as you call God in
Prayer:
If you would like to speak to:
- Gabriel, Press 1
- Michael, Press 2
- For a directory of other angels, Press 3
- If you'd like to hear King David sing a psalm while you are
holding, please press 4.
To find out if a loved one has been assigned to Heaven, Press 5,
enter his or her social security number, then press the pound key. (If you get a negative
response, try area code 666.) For reservations at "My Father's House," please
enter J-O-H-N, followed by 3-1-6. For answers to nagging questions about dinosaurs, the
age of the earth and where Noah's Ark is, please wait until you arrive here.
- Our computers show that you have already prayed once today.
Please hang up and try again tomorrow so that others may have a chance to get through.
- This office is closed for the weekend to observe a religious
holiday.
- Please pray again Monday after 9:30 am. If you need emergency
assistance when this office is closed, contact your local pastor.
[Author unknown, from "Bill's Punch Line" at
tcmrtalk@airmail.net]
