Trouble, comedy one-liners, speakers, radio showprep

    • Your accountant's letter of resignation is postmarked from Zurich.

    • The captain is running to the railing wearing a life jacket.

    • You're taking a bus to the bank to make your car payment.

    • You take assertiveness training, but you're afraid to tell your wife.

    • You tell a barber what you think of his prices before he cuts your hair.

    • You see your stockbroker hitchhiking out of town.

    • Getting there is half the fun and three-fourths of the vacation budget.

    • A black cat crosses your path and drops dead.

    • The plumber floats by on your kitchen table.

    • Your pacemaker comes with a 30-day guarantee.

    • Your wages are paid out of petty cash.

    • The pest control guy crawls under your house and never comes out.