Here's some chilling reading:
Nearly one-third of all eighth-graders have
taken an illicit drug; half of all teenagers
say they've had a drink in the last 30 days;
every day, almost 6,000 youths under 18
start smoking cigarettes.
What's a parent
to do?
Kim Hildreth, a mother living in Texas,
doesn't hesitate: Test your kids at home for
tobacco, alcohol and drugs. "From a parent's
standpoint, we need all the tricks in the
trick bag that we can get," she says.
Hildreth is so passionate about this
subject that several years ago she began
selling mail-order drug-testing kits (DrugTestYourTeen.com).
Her advice: Take your child into the
bathroom, hand them a cup and tell them,
"This is how I'm going to sleep better at
night."
I asked her about ethics issues, like
trust and respect.
"Don't be a chump," she answers in the
straight-talking way that is oh-so-Texas.
She likens it to not checking your child's
report card or not calling the other parents
before letting your child go on a sleepover.
"If you blindly believe everything a
teenager says to you, first of all you don't
recall being a teenager," she says. "That's
just ignorant. It's careless parenting."
Hildreth is convinced these home tests
are a deterrent. "It's also an effective out
for the other kids. They can say, 'My mom's
such a crazy witch, she'll drug test me.' "
Case closed? Not exactly.
Mary Devereaux also is a mother and she
would never drug test her kids unless she
had good reasons. Even then, she'd go to a
professional.
For Devereaux, trust and respect are
paramount. If you are drug testing your kids
against their will, "you've already lost
half the battle," she says.
If the results are negative, "you've
really damaged the trust," she adds. If
they're positive? "You're still going to
have to go to a professional to find out
exactly what you're dealing with."
Devereaux directs the biomedical ethics
seminars for the University of California
San Diego's Research Ethics Program. She
cites literature warning that home tests are
not always reliable and there are tricks
that can taint the results. She also argues
that research is inconclusive over whether
the threat of random drug testing is an
effective deterrent.
Her advice: Talk to your kids about drugs
and alcohol and tobacco. If you see signs
that your child's behavior is changing, ask
your child what's going on. Contact other
parents, if necessary, and school officials.
"My impulse is to have conversations, and
if drug testing needs to be done, then it
needs to be done by a professional,"
Devereaux says.
"I think parenting is all about trust and
communication," she adds.
As an ethicist and a mother, she does not
dismiss the drug problem. It's serious and
it's scary. She also is sympathetic to the
other side of the debate. "I can see why
people resort to this because it seems like
an easy solution," Devereaux says.
But someday, those kids are going to be
on their own and away from your home drug
tests. "The real goal here is to get your
child or your teenager to decide for
themselves not to do drugs," she says.
But ethics issues aren't always black and
white. Hildreth remains unswayed on the
other side. "I hear all the arguments, and
it just makes me scratch my head," she says.
"I'm blind about why it should be an issue.
It's just part of our job."
