You Are an Excellent Student Who Deserves Praise

DR. WALLACE: I have a very big problem and I need your advice. I'm a very good student. Most of my grades are A's and a few B-pluses. This would make most parents very happy, but not mine.

My parents were born in Korea, where grades are of utmost importance. My social life is very limited because I spend most of my free time studying under the supervision of my parents. I love them very much, but the pressure for me to maintain a perfect grade point average is very difficult. When I've received less than an A, my parents have become very depressed, and this makes me feel sad. I am an only child, so all of their attention is spent on me.

I keep telling my parents that I'm doing the best I can, but I'm not perfect. I am intelligent, but my parents want me to be a genius and that's just not going to happen. Please tell me what I should do to get my parents to understand that I'm doing my very best as a student. I'm 15 and have completed 10th grade. — Nameless, Garden Grove, Calif.

NAMELESS: You're an excellent student who deserves her parents' praise, not censure. Mom and Dad need to lighten their grip and take joy in who you really are. To do otherwise — to be satisfied only with perfect grades — misses the point of education and could do far more harm than good.

You need help. Talk things over with your counselor when school starts in the fall. Ask him or her to set up a conference with your parents to discuss your educational progress and goals. Your counselor can help them realize how proud they should be of their daughter's academic achievements.

THE INFORMATION FROM THE SCHOOL ADMINISTRATOR WAS WRONG

DR. WALLACE: I'm 18 and want to complete my senior year in Houston. I have a miserable home life. Both of my parents drink a lot and my father physically abuses my mother on a regular basis. I should have graduated already, but I had to stay out of school for a year when I was 10 because of an illness.

I had planned to move to Houston and live with a friend and his family. I want to complete my senior year there, but when I checked into doing this, I was told by a Houston school official that I couldn't attend school there because my parents didn't live in Houston.

Is there anything I can do to get the official to change his mind? Even if the school district won't, I'm moving to Houston, but I'd really like to be attending high school there. — Terry, El Paso, Texas

TERRY: The information you received from the Houston school administrator was in error. Since you are 18, you can establish residency in Houston without having your parents live there. Contact the Houston School District again. And send along a copy of your letter to me with my response and a copy of your birth certificate.

If for any reason that doesn't bring the desired results, seek the services of a member of Houston Legal Aid Services. Public schools are there to educate all young people, not to put up roadblocks for a teen seeking an education.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2010 CREATORS.COM