Compassionate Advice:
'TWEEN 12 AND 20

By Dr. Robert Wallace
   Creators Syndicate

10-08-19

Wallace
DR. ROBERT WALLACE

Much more 'Tween 12 & 20

She Loved her Pet and I Didn’t

DR. WALLACE: Several years ago, you wrote a column saying that every teen who wanted a pet should get one, preferably at the animal shelter. My then 14-year-old daughter wanted a cat for a pet, so she picked one out at the shelter. She took good care of him, had him fixed and took him regularly to the vet. She loves him.

But recently, my now 19-year-old daughter joined the Navy, and I have to take care of a cat I never wanted. I don't care for cats and now I'm stuck with one. Please don't say that all teens that want a pet should have one. What happens when the teen leaves home and the parent is left to care for it? — Mother, Dallas.

MOTHER: Pets are wonderful creatures that can bring much joy to a family. Your daughter can attest to that. Give the cat a chance to bring some of that same joy into your life. It may take a while, but once you and the cat begin to understand each other, the two of you will bond. When your daughter returns home, she may discover that Kitty is more yours than hers, but I'm sure she'll be happy for you.

 

HE DOESN'T KNOW THE MEANING OF 'NO'

DR. WALLACE: I've been dating Doug for about a month. He is terribly handsome, but at times he is super aggressive, which sometimes scares me. He doesn't know the meaning of "stop" or "no." I like Doug and know several girls who would like to be going out with him. What can I do to cool his aggression? — Nameless, Birmingham, Ala.

NAMELESS: Forget about how Doug looks or the fact that other girls would like to go out with him. Your instincts are warning you to stop seeing Doug. Making you feel scared is wrong! The best way to end this unnecessary feeling is through total separation from the one who is causing it.

 

LOVE OVERCOMES ALL OBSTACLES

DR. WALLACE: I'm 19 and engaged to a wonderful guy who is 31. I love him dearly. and he loves me with all of his heart and soul. I met him at a friend's wedding a year ago. and I guess you can say it was love at first sight. This guy has made my life complete. I thank the good Lord every day for allowing me to meet this guy. And to think, I almost didn't go to the wedding because I had a touch of the flu.

My problem is, you guessed it, my parents. They are very upset that I'm marrying a guy 12 years my senior. They keep telling me I'll be a young 48 when he's an old 60. They also tell me that statistics show I'll be a widow for 15 to 20 years. Yesterday, my older sister — who sides with my parents — made the remark that if Brad and I have children, he can be their father and grandfather at the same time. My entire family started laughing.

I don't see this 12-year age difference as any kind of problem. Brad feels the same way. I've been reading your column ever since I was in eighth grade, and I feel you give fair answers. I also need some moral support. Regardless of what my family thinks, Brad and I are getting married late this year. He is a college graduate and works as a sales representative for a major manufacturer. I work full time as a receptionist in a doctor's office. Please give me your opinion of my situation. — Tanya, Ocala, Fla.

TANYA: Age difference is less important when both parties are over 18. Marry Brad and live happily ever after. It will take a little time, but your family will come to realize that love overcomes all obstacles.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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