Now, just in time for freezing to death, the (Jock) Show proudly presents the shivering feature, "What to Do When the Power Goes Off:"

* Find the flashlight you stored someplace where it would be easy to find. A flashlight won't help you keep warm, but it will help you to see which family member turns blue first.

* Turn the radio on. If it's an electric radio, this won't help, but it's still better than listening to the flashlight.

* Find out if power is off in the entire neighborhood. If nobody's home, break into a house or two.

* Call the electric company and yell at the person who answers. If you can't get through, get mad and yell anyway. Anger generates body heat.

* Keep the refrigerator door closed. You don't want your food to freeze, too.

* Put on lots of clothes and build a fire in the fireplace. If you don't have a fireplace, building a fire is optional.

* Seriously consider going on vacation, or as a last resort, paying your electric bill.